"...end her life...end her life...end her life..."
"NO!"I yelled from the top of my lungs, suddenly standing.
I puffed and huffed as I tried to recognize the surroundings. It was just my hotel room...once again I was awaked by that woman's words. How could she ask me something like that?! Who was I to do such a thing?! I was just her childhood best friend. Nothing more. Nothing less. How could I ever chose to end the life of the one I've been searching for all this time? How could I end her heart beats when they were the one that gave me wings to fly and embrace myself after a long time spended in the dark of forgetfulness? How could I...put an end to the only life that was the very inspiration to the symphony of my life?!
I never knew love could hurt this much...
I never knew that letting go could be this painful...
I once let go of her and I ended up forgetting all about her existance. Now what would happen to me?
I can tell you even before it happens. I would die. My heart would stop beating along side with hers. And I would have to part ways with her forever...
~*~
"Yah, Seung Ho, do you plan to came back anytime this year?"I heard G.O.'s voice while I threw my wallet into my bag.
"Maybe."
"YAH!"
I chuckled. "Yah?"I asked on a low tone. "If I remember well, I'm still your hyung, Byung Hee..."
"Don't mind him, hyung,"spoke Thunder, taking the phone from G.O. "How's everything there?"
"Thunder...I found her,"I whispered as I looked at my pale reflexion in the big mirror.
Silence. I knew I shocked him. I was shocked too when I saw her. I was still shocked. And in so many aspects, I was wishing I never did...
"And? How is she?"
I swallowed my tears and tried to speak on a normal tone: "Hmmm...good, I guess..."
"Hyung..."
"Look, Thunder, I have to go now. I'll call you later, ok? By the way, I might return only in March. I still have some things to do here before I leave, so please talk to the manager on behalf of me."
And I hanged up. I could not bare to say it out loud. I was afraid to mention her state. It was more than enough that I knew it. It was like I was afraid that if I say it out loud a superior power would end her life and that annoying machine would stop making those annoying beeps. And I could not allow that to happen! Not on my watch!
"I see you came here once again, mister Yang,"greeded me the nurse in pink.
"How is she today?"I asked with a smile as I entered the silent ward.
The nurse arranged Mi Rae's pillow without disturbing her dark locks that were spread on it, flowing down on her chest towards the waist. "She's good. Oh look! Her pulse went up again,"she observed as the annoying machine showed a stronger pulse. "I think she recognized you!"she giggled. "I leave you two, love-birds!"
I smiled as I approached the bed. "Hi there, Mi Rae,"I greeded her, taking her hand in mine. "How was the night? Too quiet for you I guess,"I softly spoke while gently squeezzing her white hand. "Neh Mi Rae, how did you get inside my dreams?"I continued while playing with her slender fingers.
The ward's door opened and Mrs. Choi entered.
"Seung Ho,"she greeded me as she came closer to us.
"Stop!"I demanded, without even looking at her.
"What?"
"Stop coming here, Mrs. Choi. Mi Rae is your daughter, but what you asked me to do...I can not do it. I'm sorry. But I can't end her life when I can still hear her beating heart and feel her skin's warmth under my fingers. I can't end her life because that would mean that I commit suicide..."
"Then what are you going to do, Seung Ho?"
I raised my eyes. She was looking at me with curiosity. Like she expected this moment all this time. The suddenly I knew. I knew what I had to do, what I should do for Mi Rae. "I will speak to her doctor about the possibility of transfering her to a private hospital in Seoul. There I can take care of her till the end of our days,"I ended on a soft tone.
Mrs. Choi put her hand above mine. "Mi Rae would like that,"she smiled as a tear went down her cheek.
I nodded. "Can you watch her while I talk to the doctor?"
"Of course! We'll have some bonding time. It's been such a long time since we talked..."
I left the ward with the image of Mrs. Choi caressing Mi Rae's hair.
"Excuse me, can I talk to miss Scarlett Gilbert's doctor?"I asked a nurse that was arranging some files.
"Let me call him,"she answered, picking up the white phone.
After some word exchange, the nurse hanged up. "Doctor Olivies, I'm Yang Seung Ho and I would like to talk to you about Scarlett Gilbert,"I said as soon as entered his office.
"Nice to meet you, mister Yang. Scarlett Gilbert? You know her?"
I nodded. "I want to know if a transfer to another hospital would be pissible?"
"A transfer? Why? Aren't we good enough?"
"It's not that. I want her to be close to me so that I can take care of her. Plus, her parents are getting old and they agree with me that it would be for the best if she would be transfered in a private hospital in Seoul."
"In Seoul?! Well, that might be a problem. The distance it's..."
"I know,"I spoke. "But I heard that there's an airline that can take this kind of requests."
Dr. Olivies looked at me surprised. "Yes. Anubyss Airline could do it. But mister Yang, the costs are very high for such a transfer. Think about the special conditions she will need during the travel. Think about the special mean of transport she will need once at the destination. Can you afford such a thing?"
I looked straight into his eyes. "I think I saved money all my life especially for this."
~*~
"Mi Rae, can you believe you're going back to Seoul?"I smiled as I played with her left hand's fingers. "You must have missed Korea. Am I right?"
She remained impassible as always. Only that crazy machine was beeping a little louder. "So you hear me, don't you?"I whispered in her ear. "That's good! That's good! Really good, 'coz I've got something to say to you..."
I leaned closer to her while entertwining my hand with hers. "Mi Rae, I...OH! What's this?"I turned my attention towards our hands. "What's this?"I stared at the golden cercle that stood around herleft hand's ring finger.
"Mister Yang, can we talk for a little?"asked Doctor Olivies, opening the ward's door.
I left her hand on the side of the bed and followed the doctor to his office.
"Everything has been settled,"he said as I closed the door behind me. "All you need to do is sign this papers..."
I looked at them, read them and then sign them. But then there was a space where it said 'Spouse Signature'...
"Here you are,"I smiled, passing him the papers. "I need to let her know that we'll be leaving for Korea soon,"I continued while standing. "Thank you for your help!"
"Wait! You left one unsigned!"
He handed me the paper. I frowned as I saw the blank space under 'Spouse Signature'. "I'm sorry, but Scarlett is not married,"I said while putting down the paper.
"That's strange! I was sure that...AHA! Here it is!"he said while taking out a file. "Scarlett Gilbert, ballerina, brain trauma, married to Son Dongwoon..."
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